Thursday, June 30, 2011

I Triple Dog Dare you

Dare to dream of a life

that leaves you inspired, loved, fulfilled.

Dare to live your one life

so others are inspired, loved, fulfilled.

Everyone knows that Triple Dog Dares

may leave you flustered, frozen, stuck.

But the tradeoffs? Stories, laughs, bragging-rights!

What a daring way to live!

In a daring mood?  Triple Dog Dare you to check out Melissa at Making Things Up and learn more about Six Word Fridays!

Thursday, June 23, 2011

If things had been different...

If we had not met then,

would we have this wondrous life?

Would fate have intervened; righted wrongs?

Set us back onto the path

that led us to one another?

Would I still marvel at us?

Look at your smiling, unchanging face,

and still see you at seventeen,

rather than the crinkles that outline

the storming ocean-colored eyes I love?

Would we have these three boys,

that exhaust our energies, rejuvenate us;

remind of us promises made, kept?

If we had taken different paths,

would they have met here, right now?

Would we know how love's perseverance

has lined every day, every year?

And how truly fortunate we are,

that our "what if's" are reality;

the stuff dreams are made of.

What if?  If, then?  If you want to know more about Six Word Fridays, check out Melissa at a brand new Making Things Up!

Thursday, June 16, 2011

Kind of odd query...

What kind of person am I?

A person who accommodates others incessantly?

Or is an agonizing push over?

A person who is eternally optimistic?

Or one who masks her sadness?

A person who can overcome anything,

but feels so ridiculously overwhelmed lately?

Maybe I am a kind of challenge,

one who is, who can be...

A labyrinth of ideas, of potential,

full of flaws, motivated to change.

A person conflicted, but somehow fulfilled.

And is kind of at peace

with being at odds with myself.

In the end, aren't we all

kind of a juxtaposition of ideas?

Aren't we more beguiling that way?

Kind of confused?  What kind?  Are you kind?  Visit Melissa at Making Things Up and find out more about Six Word Fridays!

Tuesday, June 14, 2011

Jumping back in...

It has been a while since I was faithful to this blog. It seems that the pressures of motherhood, work and family responsibilities have swallowed up whatever energy, inspiration or ability to write these past few months. I have felt a constant struggle to force myself to sit and write, yet, what would be the point if what was out there was crap.

The last day of school was last Thursday. Life has not slowed down. But enough is enough. I have all but abandoned writing. And it's not fair.

But the writing isn't the only thing I abandoned.

Five years ago, I decided to face my greatest fear: learning to swim. My two older boys were learning how to swim. Andrew thought it was the most unfair thing in the whole world, especially since his mom didn't know how to swim. At 33 years old. With two kids. So the sass of my son made me get out of my comfort zone and learn. For a while. Until I got pregnant with Joshua and found my out.

My parents never thought my sister and I really needed to learn. Neither one of them were strong swimmers. For a short time, when I was about 3 or 4, my mother would let me go with an older neighbor to his neighbor's pool. I was terrified, but eventually, I looked forward to going. Until he got sick and eventually succumbed to lung cancer. My sister was the daredevil. When our next door neighbors finally had completed their pool, Angie got on the slide, and just began to swim. She was a fish.

When I had my boys, I was always fearful of them being in the water. Because deep down inside, I knew that if they were in distress, I would not be able to save them. They fought me on those swimming lessons. I stood my ground. They are excellent swimmers and now take lessons to improve their endurance and strokes.

Now, I am not learning to swim because my children need me to. Now, I am learning for me. Because it's about time. I am 38 years old. It's time to jump back in.

There are no more excuses.

I have run two half marathons in the last six months. I teach. I have dealt with a wide range of fail issues and caring for elderly family members. I have THREE boys, dagnamit. I can do this.

So yesterday, after dropping the older boys at their tennis lesson, I got back in the pool with an instructor. All decked out in my swimmer's cap (just because I'm doing this doesn't mean I have to have bad hair at the end of the summer), surrounded by toddlers learning to swim with another instructor.

Much like last time, there are two other ladies learning to swim with me. We smile at each other, encourage each other, talk about other challenges we have overcome in between learning how to breathe and kick underwater. There is a certain camaraderie in knowing that you are not alone.

Yesterday was not as hard as five years ago. My memory of almost drowning sixteen years ago seems far away, a lifetime ago. That scared girl cannot live within the body of this woman who has overcome so much.

Yesterday, I put my head under the water, and clenched my eyes, fumbling towards the surface to breathe, terrified as I opened my eyes as I surfaced, gasped, went back down.

Yesterday, as the instructor stood in the pool, coaxing what he knew I could do, I caught a glimpse of Joshua, standing near the pool, looking at me. As I looked at my son, I saw my husband. I was surprised, as I thought he would not be home until after the 30 minute lesson, in time to pick up Matt and Andrew from tennis 30 minutes later. He sat, watching me overcome my fear.

Yesterday, when I slid underwater, I opened my eyes and saw the clarity of the water. I turned my head, took in air, and stuck my head back under. I felt my body glide, arms rotating, legs kicking. When I reached the wall, I saw my son's smiling face and knew I was back.

Have you ever had a fear that seemed insurmountable? Were you able to overcome it? How do you cope with it?

Thursday, June 9, 2011


I am one in a family.

A family of severely myopic people.

The glasses sit upon my nose;

they've been there over thirty years.

They make the blobs of faraway

become beloved people, places I recognize.

The pair of glasses I most covet

are the ones that would focus

the unrecognizable, unknown days of tomorrow.

I wonder when those mysterious images

will become clear in my own heart.

I wonder how I will move

past the yesterday, through the today,

into that still fuzzy, undefined tomorrow.

Will the family curse of nearsightedness

keep me from looking ahead, anticipating;

from looking back, treasuring while reminiscing?

And will I need my glasses

to see what my heart sees

so clearly today? I hope not.
Near or far?  What makes you squint?  Visit Making Things Up to learn more about Six Word Fridays...

Thursday, June 2, 2011

Joy: Summer Edition

Sunny days are almost here again.

No schedule to keep us hostage.

No shoes, no watch, no worries.

Just add water, sun , three boys.

Joy is just around the corner.

What brings you joy?  Want to share?  Visit Melissa at Making Things Up for more on Six Word Fridays!