Happiness is...

Momalom's Five for Ten: Happiness

When I close my eyes, and I think about happiness, there are many images that come to mind. Here; a sampling.

Being seventeen years old, and walking on the local boardwalk. The young man, holding me close, whispered softly, like a prayer, "I love you." It took my breath away, to know what his heart felt, to hear the words aloud that I had yet to say.

Being a twenty-two year old bride, walking down the aisle and seeing the same young man, our eyes meeting with such emotion, at knowing our day had come. That my happily ever after was about to begin.

As our lives have progressed, I can honestly say that I am happy. I look around inside our home, at the pictures on our walls that chronicle our moments, our lives, and I am constantly reminded that happiness, in many instances, is a conscious decision we make every day.

How many people walk around each day, thinking, "when such and such happens, I will be happy" and when the situation does materialize, it is then immediately replaced with another "such and such." The person wastes their life waiting for the moment happiness smacks them in the face.

All too often, I have heard parents say that they can't wait for their children to grow up, move out, and start their own lives. Will they truly be happy, knowing their children are away? Will that fix whatever is wrong? I am sure it will provide some degree of accomplishment, but I don't know that I will be completely overjoyed when the last chick leaves the nest.

I know I am not the parent of an adolescent, and perhaps, I am romanticizing parenthood a tad, but some of my happiest moments are in direct result of having my children with me. Finding out I was pregnant, the first ultrasound and hearing their heartbeats, the first glance of that newborn lovey over the surgical sheet, nursing hungry baby boys in the middle of the night, breathing in the scent of a newborn baby that is so intoxicating.

And after the newness of a brand new baby wears off, it is all the little things that they do and how they react to the whole new world that they are busy discovering, every single day. Who has not felt happy at the sight of a wobbly toddler, as they prance, relishing in their new, hard fought mobility? Who hasn't giggled at the antics of a young child who is just beginning to venture out with words and sentences?

Happiness for me is being a witness to my sons' growth and development. I have marveled at their curiosity, their wonder, their love for John and I, their love for each other, and our extended family. My heart melts when my sons tell me excitedly at the happenings at school, what they learned, what they are anticipating the most. As they grow older, I imagine that I will stand in amazement that they are grown adults, wonder where the time went, but never regret a moment.

My happiness is not measured in the amount of things I own, what car I drive, where I will go on vacation. My happiness is driven by making people laugh, at my crazy stories, at themselves, at life's lemons.

I am blessed. My children are healthy. I am married to a man I love and respect. I come home to a chaotic, messy home, filled with laughter and love.

My happiness is measured by the amount of people who make me smile on a daily basis. It is measured by how I choose to react to difficult challenges. It is measured by the difference I make in the lives of the children I teach.

Happiness has a ripple effect. The more of it you have, the more of it gets spread around. If you are happy, the people around you tend to be happy too. And the more people you are in contact with throughout the day, the more opportunities you have to share it with everyone else.

Please don't misunderstand and think I am just the happiest person put on Earth. I have had a lot of bad things happen to me, usually things that could not be ignored, changed or moved away from. There wasn't a whole lot of choices on what I could do.

But I do have the power, the opportunity, the responsibility; to myself, and my family, to detect every shred of happiness I can find, in any and all situations.

Because if you are given the choice, would you rather wallow in self pity and sadness, or try to walk a little lighter?

Because if all you get is what you have, can that really make you happy?

Because being happy has nothing to do with what you have.

It has EVERYTHING to do with choices you make, how you react, what you do.

And I will change what I can, accept what I cannot and CHOOSE to be happy.

Every day.

Every time.

Surrounded by those who make me the happiest.

No regrets.