Rare indulgences and being Lost...

This weekend was a rarity in my life over predictability, routine and rules. Since Mother's Day weekend, I have been ignoring the fact that my refrigerator and garage freezer were reaching dangerously low levels of nourishment.  You would think that the cobwebs in the pantry would have been a tip-off.

On Friday afternoon, after a "quick" (was there ever a bigger oxymoron?) run to the bank, I picked up Joshua and headed to the grocery store. I knew what I was up against; three tired and hungry children, hundreds of people with the same task at hand, but, I had nothing to serve my family other than frozen sausages, frozen basil, American cheese slices, and milk.

I was also starved, as I had lunch at 11:00 am. It was a bad combination. Very bad.

One hundred dollars later, I had frozen lunches, breakfast foods and fresh veggies to add to my pantry, refrigerator and garage freezer.

I also bought Haagen-Dazs ice cream. I have not been intimate with Haagen since Pregnancy #2. Damn lunch at 11:00 am and no snacks in between.

After a quick stop home to drop off perishables, I went back out to the "fancy" grocery store and decided to indulge in blue cheese burgers, stuffed shrimp and other curiosities. I also picked up miniature roses, that just happened to be on sale. They were glorious, fragrant; just the indulgence my eyes needed on this weary Friday afternoon.

I got home, fired up the grill for the burgers,  indulged in a glass or two of wine, and watched Finding Nemo. There is something incredibly soothing about the underwater scenes, about the message every young child needs to hear: your parents will go the ends of the Earth for you. As I watched the movie, I was surrounded by the loves of my life, and my heart indulged in the moment.

Saturday brought a hair appointment in the never-ending battle with gray and later on, the opportunity to babysit my two nieces. Take out Thai and sushi with even more fabulous wine. Five babies asleep, the right seating arrangements and the acquisition of the remote assured me chick-flick heaven (He's Just Not That Into You and Julie and Julia), accompanied by a torrid tryst with Haagen, as my husband lay sleeping blissfully unaware on the couch nearby. The only evidence of what transpired; an empty carton, a forlorn spoon and the inevitable 5 pounds that moment of weakness with Mint Chip will cost me...

Sunday brought a day of work for hubby and intense negotiations with three children to ensure a couple of hours at the Outlet Mall...Final arrangements for delivery of negotiated goods to be handed over upon completion of said shopping trip, with no signs of Jab, Poke and Whine. Mommy got HUGE discounts on some summery looking clothes and some peace while acquiring them. Children got super soaker weapons and an impressive looking water apparatus that will entertain them for the duration of summer vacation, and with a coupon to boot! Sunday brought much needed and heavily discounted retail indulgence.

As the evening wound down, we rushed through The Witching Hour at warp speed so that we could indulge in FOUR (!) hours of Lost. Although I have not been religious about watching it (seriously, how could I commit to another thing when I barely can remind myself that my bladder needs to be emptied every once in awhile), I have thoroughly enjoyed the twists and turns that it has brought into our family room over the past six years.

The mental challenge of watching Lost last night was invigorating and breathtaking...Without revealing too much, the ending was beautiful. The connections all of these people had made me think of the connections we all have within our lives. Sometimes, the more difficult the situation, the tighter the bond we have with the people we share the experience with.

And that is really it. After watching the finale last night, there were several moments that were immensely spiritual in nature. How people are connected, how our actions affect all of those around us. How we need others, emotionally, physically, spiritually, in order to live.

How we cannot do it alone.

Anyone who is a parent will tell you how much harder it is when your spouse or partner is not available to help you. And sometimes, it isn't even about all the things you have to do physically. It is about having a sounding board, someone to share the incredible joys, and someone to play rock, paper, scissors when there is a sick child and work to go to. Someone to share.

When I think about my life, I know that my existence would be completely different had it not been for certain people, certain circumstances, certain experiences. If I had my own Lost, I am sure that I would have a parallel reality floating around somewhere.

But I am certain that it would not be better than the reality I live every day.

And I think that that was the beauty of Lost. That, in our own way, we are all lost. We are all finding our way, making our own reality, regardless of the smoke monsters and polar bears that might roam our uninhabited island.

But were it not for those who are our constant companions, those that we can rely on and who we help in their own troubles, we would truly be lost.