Tuesday, November 9, 2010

The road to hell....

The saying goes that the road to hell is paved with good intentions. I should know. I think I have paved that road EVERY. SINGLE. DAY. OF. MY. LIFE.

And since becoming a mother, I would say that I have been working overtime.

In the last four days, I have seen the best intentions get feelings hurt, words misspoken, leaving people frustrated, angry, sad.

The intention was to be helpful. The intention was based on assumptions.

We all know what happens when we assume. You make an arse out of you and me.

So the question becomes, once you are witness to someone's frustration, and their subsequent feelings of defeat and receive an apology that you don't think you should have gotten (because we are ALL human), what do you do?

Do you email the person and attempt (with the best intentions) to cheer up the person?

Do you just let it be?

For once, I am going to keep my mouth shut. I will not call or email. I will not Facebook or text. I will give that person space. I will not, with even the best intentions, make the situation worse.

This is difficult. I am never short on words. I always have something to say. But, in this case; as I am guessing, is the case many a time; I will not say what will make me feel better, momentarily.

Because, inevitably, I will feel worse. Because the reaction will probably not be one that I anticipate.

Because most people need their space.

Furthermore, I think I have done my time paving that road.

I don't think I need to be told where to find it.


  1. It is my sincere belief that if someone really knows you, they know your intentions. Let it go.

  2. Oh dear. I, too, never know when to shut up. I need to remember that a girl who opens her mouth makes room for her own foot.

  3. I've had my foot in my mouth so often, the toe jam is gone!

    If people get upset, take it with a grain of salt, and throw it over your shoulder!

  4. I feel misunderstood so much of the time, even when I'm trying to make someone else feel heard or better or understood. Sigh. I hear you, and I hope resolution comes without more angst.


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